Monday, June 13, 2005

"Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles...

...staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements."

I don't mean to complain but today is just one of those work days. You know the kind. When the clock moves backwards (I swear I've seen the clocks on our phones, computers and call systems move backwards at least once a week if not more), when the n key doesn't work on your keyboard unless you slam it six or sevennnnnnn times, when you have to wear "business casual" attire to a job where you only interact with customers on the phone, when the person on the other end of the phone thinks you're the idiot because they can't get out of a legally binding financial agreement that they willingly signed, and when the lite music they pump into the ceiling makes you want to take your bic pens and stab your eardrums out (Ashley Simpson IS NOT A SINGER!). You know that kind of day, right?

"Someone's got a case of the Monday's!"

Ahh, shut the fuck up.

I hate my job. I hate sitting here in a cubicle with annoying little brown cloth walls and equally annoying neutral brown swirl carpet (what's with the neutral colors in work environments nowadays? Who started that awful trend...and who do I have to kill to make it stop?). I knit almost all the time now when I'm stuck here. Everyday someone inevitably asks me what I'm knitting. I don't have a project in mind; I've just come to the conclusion that knitting something, anything helps me through my day. I picture a scarf that's going to go on and on and snake its way around the building and down the stairs to the lobby. I keep thinking to myself, "this job is only temporary...it's not forever...I'm stronger for putting up with this shit." But what if I get my degree and I end up in a job where I work in another shit brown colored cubical with shit brown carpets and amusing posters on the walls that read such spirit lifting quotes as "Be Your Self, but Be Your Best Self" and "Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail" (What damn trail? I get in trouble if I don't use the pre-approved phone script!) What if my coworkers are just as smiley fuck-faced and zombified at my post-degree job as they are now? “I love my job! I’ve been here five years and every day it gets better and better!” (Did corporate hand out lobotomies at the last holiday party?). Could I handle this for potentially ANOTHER 40 years? It makes me wanna wrap the phone cord around my neck till I pass out.

2 Comments:

Blogger Alder said...

Ave! Knitters of black wool. Morituri te salutant.
--Joseph Conrad, "The Heart of Darkness."

10:41 AM  
Blogger Alder said...

Actually, here's a more apropos literary reference:

"Dolor"

I have known the inexorable sadness of pencils,
Neat in their boxes, dolor of pad and paper-weight,
All the misery of manila folders and mucilage,
Desolation in immaculate public places,
Lonely reception room, lavatory, switchboard,
The unalterable pathos of basin and pitcher,
Ritual of multigraph, paper-clip, comma,
Endless duplication of lives and objects.
And I have seen dust from the walls of institutions,
Finer than flour, alive, more dangerous than silica,
Sift, almost invisible, through long afternoons of tedium,
Dropping a fine film on nails and delicate eyebrows,
Glazing the pale hair, the duplicate grey standard faces.

-- Theodore Roethke, 1943

10:49 AM  

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