Sunday, November 13, 2005

The Wrinkles Are Coming! The Wrinkles Are Coming!

When I first saw the hair this morning, I thought it was just a really light strand of red. I had my hair dyed way back in August and some of hair near my face had lightened quite considerably. I assumed that this was just a freak strand that had done the same even though it was near the center of my scalp and to the back. But when I pulled it away from the rest of my hair and took a better look, I realized it was just a little too light and transparent. So I yanked it out, stuck it next to a black cloth, and scrutinized it under a lamp. Sure enough, the end nearest to the scalp wasn’t red or light red or even my normal mousy brown color.

I just found my first white hair. And its glistening color was boldly mocking me:

“Now you’re going to dye your hair for a whole new reason!!! The thought of me and all my gray friends invading your cherished hair with a determined vengeance is going to drive you to religiously seek out the salon every other month until you die! Bwah hah hah!”

*GASP!* I am completely inconsolable. Shouldn’t there be a rule in nature that if you don’t at least feel like an adult, you can hold off looking like one for a while? I’m too young to have gray hair! I don’t have a mortgage to worry about or a sizable 401K or even children to drive me to the brink of insanity. And I’m only 28 years old!! Shouldn’t I at least be over 30 before I start going gray?

And the worst part is that I have a salon appointment next weekend. I should have left the hair attached to my head so it could be dyed along with all the rest. Now it’s going to grow back in a brilliant shade of white and stick out even more against the red locks!

I think this is what I deserve for making fun of all the people in my life who have white hairs. It was funny when they had it... but I'm not laughing now that it's my turn.

I’m sure that crow’s feet are just around the corner.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

1 Comments:

Blogger Ghost Dog said...

I saw my first grays creeping in at my temples when I was 22. Now 34, I'm used to them, and I like to think I don't have a hangup about them. But I keep my hair about as short as it was in the Army, probably as much to minimize the amount of care it needs as to minimize the visibility of the gray ones.

The wife says it looks distinguished. *shrug*

7:47 AM  

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